Golden Saucers: Reverberating Actions

The Bitter Barn. A phrase that my dear family has tossed around on more than several occasions this month-long break at home. And rightly so. Of course no one wants to keep hearing about how things are so different in England, how I miss hostel accommodation prices, safer travel, healthier food, and the constant surroundings of classic literary genius.

It's a lot easier to succumb to the illusion that the experience of living completely on one's own and successfully planning and executing backpacking excursions all over Europe was simply a dream. A dream because, when people start looking over your shoulder, making you aware of your own inadequacies in decision-making, you lose confidence and start questioning yourself. The mantra for this last semester to myself and others has been: "I survived six months in Europe utterly and completely on my own. I can handle _______. "

And everyone is tired of hearing that. Honestly, no one really cares about this kind of life-changing event. So, I ask myself, what did I really learn in Europe that goes beyond the everyday things I miss? Here's a few golden saucers, universal truths, I've compiled.

--Love and be fiercely loyal to your friends. They are the links to your inner-child and allow you to find the true ore of any experience, especially in travel. Spontaneously remind them of how thankful you are that they are there for you.

--In the event of awkward handshake/moving in for hugs/flailing hand gestures, just give a HUG! Hug your family often. Hugs are the essence of compassion, love, encouragement, safety, and reassurance.

--Explore. Make the most of breaks, time off, and weekends.

--Relationships are rarely a matter of one's appearance but are much more dependent upon encouragement and communication from both parties. Girls: do not expect for anything to happen simply by being noticed. More than likely, a guy won't talk to you because it takes a lot of guts to make the first move. Help him out. Communicate. Dare to get turned down. Guys: Don't want to go so far as to enter the "date" territory on first meeting? Ask a girl out to coffee. Tea. It's not really a date, but if it goes really well, you can make it one.

--Be a listener and offer selfless conversation; listen to every person like they are giving a one-time-only boarding call for your flight number. Always try to ask more questions about the person you're talking to than they can ask about you.

--Walk as often as possible. Walking allows for vital personal time to think, absorb, and evaluate.

--When walking into a room of complete strangers in which you don't know a soul,walk around and introduce yourself (the food table or bar is a good place for this). As excruciatingly painful as it is, honestly people probably won't think much about the fact that you're there alone.

--Regardless of your tastes or morals, alcohol is a necessary part of social behavior and business. Find a few drinks you like. You can always drink and never get drunk. Sipping is the key. If there's an option for cider or Strongbow, take it. It's like apple juice.

--If a guy starts buying you drinks, repeatedly, thank him politely for the drinks, try to sip them as long as possible, keep your head, and NEVER feel rude about leaving with no explanation if he is beginning to be more adamant that there be "payment" for his benevolence.

--Always deposit part of your pay check into a savings account.

--At some point in her life, every girl should try to go a month with little or no make-up or extra hair appliances. Mascara, chap stick, hairdryer, shampoo, soap. Confront yourself honestly.

--Make it a daily goal to acknowledge someone who has a seemingly menial task, even if he or she is rude to you. Imagine spending eight hours a day picking gum off London sidewalks in the rain. Show that person that they are a person--a beautiful person.

Such are the golden saucers of my Europe experience. As I try to step out of the bitter barn, I realize these universals are trans-atlantic. They are realizations that, thanks to my solitary European travels, I have incorporated into daily American life. It's important to step back and fairly evaluate life-changing experiences. As I use the next few months to truly evaluate , I see how my evaluations take on a more global picture, a macro-crumpet view, and I can use my actions to reverberate off others so as to impart these "golden saucer" truths that bitter barn words fail to communicate.