The Crumpet Collection: January and February

Lady J-Ho’s Tea Time ‘09 Top 10 Crumpets for Week 1Crumpets: Some are tasty, some are burnt, some are what this American never learnt.

Crumpet #1: The politically correct name for the collapse/fall of the Roman Empire is “transformation of the Roman world.”

Crumpet #2: “It’s so difficult to decide what is worth spending your money on…souvenirs, bus passes, walking shoes…”
“Only two things you need to spend money on: Food. Beer……And maybe cab fare.”

Crumpet #3: Oedipus Rex is exactly the type of uplifting play everyone goes to the university square to see in the dreary, rainy, cold of a typical Sunday afternoon.

Crumpet #4: When the coiled bowels of a hairdryer start to appear as orange as the fires of Mount Doom, the final battle for Middle Earth does in fact predictably follow.

Crumpet #5: “The library is to humanities students as the laboratory is to science students.”

Crumpet #6: When crossing the street, it is helpful to look to the direction from which traffic is actually coming.

Crumpet #7: The great American Norton Anthology is, even trans-atlantically, still the authority on the oldest surviving literature of Britain…unfortunately. And the pages are still as thin as tissue paper.

Crumpet #8: Sandwich quality is measured by its award of an A through I rating…most likely inspected and administered by the truly legitimate British Sandwich Association.

Crumpet #9: Drinking (and carrying around) a 2-litre bottle of water is not a rare occurrence when one must keep pace with British walkers who feel the need to stroll at the pace equal to that of an Olympic walker’s marathon event for miles at a time.

Crumpet #10: Gangsta shades...in fact any U-V ray protective eye-wear of any kind, is simply not worn. This, fellow gangstas from the west-side (of the globe—that is the geographic globe, not Master Shakespeare’s world,) is a major problem.

And the number one missed item of the week (aside from family and friends because those are givens…) is:

Yes, as I’m sure you guessed: CHICKEN ENCHILADAS.


Let’s face it, we all know how study abroad students write epistles on their facebook notes and genuinely believe that dear friends will read every word. If you want an epistle, I’m sure we all know I would give you one even if you didn’t ask. So, to spare you all the insignificant details, my weekly crumpet collections I hope can offer you a glimpse into some of the idiosyncratic highlights of my daunting 5-month pursuit of scholastic and cultural achievements in oh so Great Britain. After a week of culture shock and being utterly alone for survival (yes, even the Ritz cracker supply is down to zero), I suppose these details could be good research for psychiatry. But I hope you gain some insight into the mindset of British culture, which many mistake to be so similar to our own simply because of the language similarity. (aha, there, you see…this conclusion itself was almost an epistle...But alas, brevity is the soul wit.)

If you wish to be untagged/tagged in my weekly posts, please inform me posthaste, and I will endeavour to acquiesce to your wishes. If you feel slighted in not being tagged, please know that it was consciously decided upon who could suffer my warblings, so, be put at ease.

Peace out brussel sprout, (yes, I am amending the standard signature in case I ever make it to Brussels, where, I hope to shout this from atop the HQ of the European Union. Plus, this sounds a bit more appropriate for the gangsta British appropriation of peace out, yo.)

JHO.

Bollocks...it's still a bloody epistle.

Lady JHo's Top 10 Crumpets: Week 2
Wed. Jan. 21, 2009
Crumpets: Some are tasty, some are burnt, some are what this American never learnt.

Crumpet #1. It appears that the United Kingdom singlehandedly keeps the Australian UGG boot industry afloat.

2. If a group of, say, 4 is walking down the sidewalk in one direction, and you are walking alone toward them, as it is 1 against 4, you will be the one to get budged to the 3-cm bike lane and run the risk of being sacrificed to the speeding BMWs and Smart Cars whizzing by within millimeters of your person. However, walking down country lanes is another matter completely…each party must assemble in single-file.

3. Curry is not jelly, custard, or pudding as for some reason I had it construed in my twisted way of thinking; rather, it is something like spicy stir fry/stew/soup served over rice.

4. Saying something like, “My pants are wet,” is a bit inappropriate for public conversation given that jeans or longish “pants” are actually called “trousers,” and pants are undergarments. A bit problematic.

5. After a few rounds of anxious waiting, panicked confusion, attempting-to-be-casual perusal of departure timetables, and hurried platform jumping, one begins to realize that the final destination that appears on the trains’ marquee is not necessarily the only destination.

6. After standing outside the shower for 20 minutes with the water still running cold, it might help to make sure one flipped the water heater switch. Although, for a reasonable shower length, this must be done at least 40-min to an hour before shower time.

7. “So does everyone actually read everything listed on the bibliography?”
“Yes, do you not have bibliographies in America?”
“Well, yes, but usually the reading assignments for class are pretty explicit about what sections or selections we should read for each class.”
“Ohh, well that’s a lot like school [high school] for us. We did get spoon-fed a lot there. You see, it’s much more independent here, you’re responsible for your own reading.”
Professor: “So, did we do the reading? How many people did the reading?”
4 out of 20 hands.
Right.

8. Apparently, anything is acceptable as long as girls wear leggings or tights. Men’s dress shirt and leggings to class? Righto.

9. Riding the bus not only drains one’s coin (as exact change is needed every time), but bus rides also use up the Dramamine tablets, which tend to be popped like vitamins lately.

10. England must have special marshmallows because they have the uncanny ability to resist melting when sitting atop hot chocolate for up to 30 minutes, which is much longer than 5-second American marshmallows.

Amendment to last week’s: Turns out the sandwich rating scale is counter-intuitive… “A” sandwiches are the worst, while “I” sandwiches are the best quality.

Number One missed item this week (besides friends and family because those are givens):

Free printing.

Highlights this week: Downtown Birmingham—Bullring mall, Stratford-upon-Avon, Warwick Castle, mastering public transportation, purchasing a rail pass, acquiring map reading skills superior to Lewis and Clark, and replenishing the Ritz cracker supply.

I cannot believe it is already time to be doing this for Week 2! I have packed a lot of day trip travel into the 4-day weekend (I have no classes Mon or Fr!), and I am slowly getting conditioned into daily British oddities. Above all, I am daily humbled by ineptitude, and I have quickly surpassed the fear of asking questions and looking incompetent. It is by losing all self-confidence that each tiny victory in rebuilding it seems like such a huge success. And then you realize you never really lost it, you just let too many exasperated sighs or amused stares get to you. Humility is certainly a good thing to learn, and the ability to look like a complete idiot at least 25% of the day and go along with it is a big step. And I’m learning that as much as it feels important to dress, talk, eat, or even think a certain way to fit in with the dominant culture, going with your own style—while it certainly draws attention—is usually the best way to go. Granted, that’s not an Earth-shattering revelation, but it’s a truth that we all need to be reminded of here and there.

So…I’m pullin out the gangsta shades. If the sun ever comes out again to wear them.

Peace out brussel sprout.

Lady JHo’s Top Ten Crumpets: Week 3
Wed. Jan. 28, 2009
You know the drill.
Crumpets: some are tasty, some are burnt, some are what this American never learnt.

Crumpet #1: Immature first-year drunken hooligans who beat down my flat door yelling “Frank the Tank” at least two nights (school nights) a week are perfect evidence of excessive pub drinking that would qualify as alcoholism anywhere else. Try defending your apartment alone at midnight in Shakespeare “Will Power” pjs as you futilely attempt to explain to such rioters that you are not “Frank,” you just moved in, he no longer lives here, and you are the last person alive who would know where to find him.

Crumpet #2: Walking down the street and getting soaked with road splatter by passing buses does in fact happen in real life.

Crumpet #3: It is common courtesy to note if a train seat is reserved on cross-country passages by consulting the blinking reservation cues above the seat. So don’t get too excited when you find a seat and get all nestled in only to have a dignified businessman awkwardly coughing, hovering, and wondering how blind you are that you missed the blinkers as he waits for you to realize you are in his seat.

Crumpet #4: When one finds herself humming Reverend Mother’s “Climb Every Mountain” more than three times a day, whether it be literally climbing a mountain, walking up steps, or just walking up steep sidewalks, there is probably too much climbing going on.

Crumpet #5: Oh, one last question. Will I have access to a shower?
Eh, weeeellll….ye see…aye. I mean, it’s not one ye can stand up in, but ther sorta a hose ye can lean o’er and wash yer hair.
…silence…
It’s one of those ye can wash the dog in, ye know.

Crumpet #6: “I mean, it’s a castle. It’s huge. There’s no way we can lose it.” Fallacy. Anyone who has tried to look for one knows the ironic truth (yes, I realize the problem with that syntactical construction) that the closer one gets to it, the more elusive it becomes.

Crumpet #7: ‘Ale’ is not necessarily ginger ale.

Crumpet #8: Picking up and wrestling a huge 10-kilo care package that barely fits through the mail window and walking by the 20-person queue with everyone wondering what kind of meth lab you’re running is not embarrassing at all. (At least they don’t know you stood by the post window for 30 minutes before it opened because you knew supplies would be arriving.)

Crumpet #9: When winding through the snow-covered mountains in a Scotland-bound train, you cannot help but start smiling to yourself while listening to the Hogwarts theme on your iPod. The stranger sitting across from you will think you are a bit odd, but such is their atmospheric loss.

Crumpet #10: When watching television, you generally have 10 choices: BBC 1, BBC 2, BBC 3, BBC 4…and so on. Radio? BBC 1…BBC 2…and so on. Talk about a media monopoly. No wonder they set the standard for handling humanitarian aid ads. I hope their edict doesn’t extend to Arbor Day ads.


Number One missed item this week:
Jane Austen DVD collection…but so thankful for A1 sauce. Mushroom stuffed omelet? A1 and I can take you down next time.

Highlights this week: Edinburgh (Castle, Holyrood Palace, Royal Yacht, mountains, Royal Botanical Gardens, Scottish Parliament, city centre) and Loch Ness, Inverness, monster hunting.

And so, despite some avalanche dodging, I am alive yet another week, which will mark the longest I have ever been out of the USA. I am finally settling into a weekly routine and continue to meet new, fascinating people everyday. I was so fortunate to experience Scotland this past weekend, and it has certainly been the highlight of my time here so far. While Edinburgh is certainly a crowded city, its historical depth and close proximity to breathtaking rural landscapes was a perfect break from commercial, modern, crowded, brake-squeaky Birmingham, which I am learning to call home. With my sightseeing complete in Scotland, I can’t wait to go back in April to work on my research. No comments from the peanut gallery…research is great fun when you can read and write in that kind of atmosphere :) Classes are also settling into a routine, and I think I’ve got a grip on exactly what is expected from week to week. It certainly is quite the wakeup call when you realize that you are the only one in a seminar coming in with an American mindset, and my perspective on something like racism is going to be strikingly different from a British perspective. It is indeed a beautiful moment for the mind when it suddenly perceives the new pattern in the optical illusion that had been there all along. I wish everyone a week of pulling out those optical illusion books and discovering patterns you never saw before. It’s good exercise for the mind, so hopefully if you spend time in another country, you won’t be as sarcastic and begrudging as these crumpet collections have (unintentionally) turned out to be!

Peace out Brussels sprouts.

Top 10 Crumpets (Count it. 10. NOT 25.): Week 4
Wed. Feb. 4, 2009
I would hate for anyone to get excited to read another “25 things” only to realize that you will not be gaining any secret insights into my soul. So, you have been warned. As a cultural exercise, which is what these crumpets are intended to be, I could require that everyone I tag must write a note of “10 Nuggets” thinking of 10 American phrases, traditions, everyday nothings, etc. and analyze why we do them the way we do or say things the way we say them. Good luck puzzling out some of those answers…if you are a glutton for puzzlement.

But on with the crumpets…

Crumpet #1: One must pay 7.50 pounds (approx $10.76) to request an inter-library loan at the University of Birmingham. A serious setback to the average student’s research needs.

Crumpet #2: In Britain, when someone casually asks you, “Are you all right?” (the standard greeting) in an intonation used by Americans to suggest that you are a bit mental, they are merely asking ‘how are you?’ or ‘what’s up?’ If they think you are a bit crazy, then they will ask, “Are you mental?” Except in some cases, this sounds like, me’ull, men’al, ment-il, mentol?”

Crumpet #3: When the biggest snow an island has seen in 18 years hits, anything is fare game for sled material. Cake pans, plastic grocery bags used as diapers, pizza boxes, and cafeteria trays are enlisted as “sledges.” If you can’t find any of these items, simply take your door off and haul it out to the hill. I kid you not.

Crumpet #4: If one would happen to get the notion to try something illegal, the UK is not the place to do it. Surveillance cameras haunt you around every nook, cranny, and vending machine. And the cameras on the buses are quite helpful for guaranteeing time to fix one’s hair in the mornings, allowing you at least 5 more minutes of sleep at home.

Crumpet #5: This marketing stratagem appears on the back of every UK Ritz Cracker box above the suggestion to add Philadelphia cream cheese to the Ritz snack… “Ritz…they are extremely moreish on their own but have you tried these tasty ideas?” Moreish? Who uses that? Better question: Who uses that in a marketing strategy?

Crumpet #6: When one finds herself absentmindedly grooving to “MmmBop,” “I Like to Move it, Move it,” and bagpipe techno every single night at 9:05 p.m. courtesy of the (male) neighbors, drastic measures must be taken. Cranking my regular 9 a.m. pep song, “Let’s Get Down to Business to Defeat the Huns” a little louder every morning should do the trick.

Crumpet #7: When one travels to a foreign country tempting ultimate failure and emotional breakdown in part for the challenge of testing one’s self to see if such a feat, can in fact, be completed successfully, it is best to ensure that one’s dad never discovers Skype Chat. I love, love, love my daddy, but when daily (hourly) communication becomes more frequent 4,000 miles from home than that which occurs living at home over school breaks, the line must be drawn somewhere.

Crumpet #8: Flapjacks are not pancakes; rather, they are bar-type-things made of shortbread, granola, and marshmallows.

Crumpet #9: It is a truth universally acknowledged (or at least should be), that doing laundry in mixed company is an awkward breach of propriety. Especially when one cannot figure out how to dispense laundry detergent from a sealed plastic capsule and must politely accept an offer from said company to assist in the matter. Needless to say, watching (personal) clothing items in the little washer window while waiting for the suds to appear (indicating the disintegration of the capsule) was marked by unnecessary awkwardness, which would have been avoided had said company behaved in a more gentlemanly-like manner and simply refrained from being of “help.”

Crumpet #10: NEVER travel on trains in England on Sundays. Sure, one would think a lovely jaunt to the country is such a quaint, beautiful idea. No. Do not be fooled. Packed like sardines in a train and standing for an hour and a half on a Sunday evening with a million other university students going the same place you are is not idyllic. But, always searching for the positive…you get a good work out by passing the time strengthening your core trying to keep your balance on the moving apparatus without holding on to other people for support.


And that is my week in a crumpet…shell. School is starting to feel like school, not so much vacation as it felt there for awhile. I laugh at myself now over my concern that after the first few weeks, I would have no new crumpets to share. Ahh, how we underestimate our fallibility even after we have resigned ourselves to it.

No.1 Missed Item This Week:
Colloquialisms (especially rapper ones)
Words like, seriously, ballin, gangsta, yo, dude, sketch, trippin, not feelin it, peace out, that’s how I roll, fo sho, holy smokes, crumbcakes, what’s the deal, cool beans, sweet, oh snap, pop and lock it, drop it, boots with the fur, make it rain, and my most favorite of all….peace out yo. etc are sadly slowly slipping out of my everyday use due to the fact that it takes longer to explain the slang than to stop myself from using it. Therefore, using bland, universal, phrases have unfortunately been substituted. But I am so thankful to be able to use my fun words with my people at home over facebook and skype…it keeps my sanity. Thank you for humoring me.

Peace out Brussels sprouts.

Top 10 Crumpets Week 5

Crumpet #1: In my opinion, if an institution “requires” all students in one lecture class to read 15 texts outside of lecture, and charges 7.50 pounds for requesting an inter-library loan, knowing that the entire class will be needing the same books, if I were the president of such an institution I would a) have more copies of the texts available and b) not put a 12-item limit to loans per library card.

Furthermore…the library should not have the right to “recall” books earlier than the mutually agreed upon 3-week loan.

Crumpet #2: The London Tube electronic swipe pass is called an Oyster Card…how in the world that name applies, I have no idea.

Crumpet #3: It is highly likely that one who has studied, researched, and adequately prepared for a trip, even in the slightest sense of ‘prepared,’ probably knows more than the tourist information agent hiding behind the little desk secretly hoping you won’t ask a difficult question. How do these people sleep at night knowing they have misled hopeless tourists day in and day out?

Crumpet #4: Similarly, beware of information agents who say, “steal a car” in response to a query regarding the easiest way to get to a place, or “oh, that will take 4 hours to get there by bus,” in response to a query regarding a site 20 miles up the road, or my favorite, “you’re best getting a cab…it’s a bit of a walk” regarding the query to get to a city centre no more than half a mile away. Please. All this translates into: “Don’t bother me.”

Crumpet #5: Happy Hippo biscuits (made by Kinder…as in Kinder Egg) are the best thing ever since teddy grahams. The Hippo treats are shaped like hippos in a wafer with hazelnut filling on the inside. They brighten anyone’s day. Can’t wait to try the Happy Hippo Cocoa Cream flavor.

Crumpet #6: After 5 weeks away from any culinary-related responsibilities, washing dishes and setting a table are two of the most comforting chores in the world.

Crumpet #7: The big green man featured on the crosswalk pictures becomes the man of one’s dreams at night after a full day of street-crossing.

Crumpet #8: Trying to explain the concept of Southern biscuits and gravy to someone who thinks a biscuit is a cookie and gravy is brown juice/blood mixture from cooked meat is rather complicated.

Crumpet #9: When a security guard asks you, “Looks like someone was singin last night!” in response to your change purse full of coins, do not automatically assume he was reading your mind and heard you singing “Feed the Birds” or “Just You Wait, Henry Higgins.” This is a customary phrase said to someone who has a lot of change. (Why musicals have become such a daily infusion into my thought processes, I am at a loss, especially given that I can’t sing and generally successfully repress musical urges because of that fact).

Crumpet #10: If someone from the opposite gender asks you (rather flawlessly) to meet him at a bar to ‘practice his English’…it is probably best to leave the Oxford Companion to English Grammar at home. Along with the zoo animal flashcards.
With that said, this is probably the most overused pickup line circulating in international communities.

I will try to keep this narrative brief, but my stay in London was probably the closest snapshot of ultimate Englishness for the entire trip so far. Sharing breakfast, dinner, and tea time with our hostess who lived in a row of small two-story apartments in a London suburb, generated some of the best conversation I have ever had. Since I was 13, I have kept a list of my favorite conversations on big travel ventures. (Yes, I realize the irony of this given that conversation is not my strongpoint). But just to give some scale, this one made the list. I’m sure the fact that it was so nice to be in an actual home with someone who reminded me so much of my mom had something to do with that, but even so; conversation like that is really at the heart of traveling. I mean, who knew hardcore skiers who scale the Alps all the time actually prefer staying a week on holiday in Maine?

Highlights this week: LONDON!! There is way too much to see, but it is close enough to make a few trips while I’m here for 5 more months. My favorite part of London was the Poet’s Corner in Westminster Abbey. Jane Austen represent :)

No.1 Missed Item This Week:
SWEET TEA (not the hot kind, not the artificial kind from the can…the fresh-brewed, on the rocks kind).

Peace out Brussels sprouts.

Top 10 (+10) CANNOLI Weeks 6 and 7

Feb. 24, 2009
Cannoli are flaky pastries filled with sweetened ricotta cream cheese and chocolate.
On my “Reading Week,” aka Spring Break, I spent 10 (expensive) days in Italy touring Rome, Venice, Pisa, and Florence. It was great to meet up with Emily Baird and Kristen Whaley there—familiar faces from the bubble! We met lots of new people, swapped stories, and definitely had some memorable moments. ;)

Here are some cannoli tidbits regarding my cultural findings…

Cannoli #1: Italians expect exact change for everything. It is a huge burden to make change for tourists. Additionally, hardly any businesses, including hostels, take credit cards, which makes the whole exact change thing even harder.

Cannoli #2: One will likely knock 20 years off her life in Italy after inhaling so much secondhand smoke in public places, such as train stations, hostel rooms, restaurants, bars, and tightly packed sidewalks.

Cannoli #3: Gelato—ice cream with a lighter, more moussy texture—is the best dessert that ever was created. It comes in a wide variety of flavors. Nocciolo (hazelnut) is a personal favorite. Likewise, donuts in Italy are quite spectacular. But then, what food isn’t in Italy?

Cannoli #4: One must take great care in ensuring that she does not miss huge historical monuments on account of always looking down at the sidewalks to avoid making eye contact with Italian men. The slightest bit of eye contact or courtesy smile is construed as something way more than it was meant to be. And you will pay for this…sometimes for as long as five blocks.

Cannoli #5: If one does not have a reserved ticket on a train, she must validate it by punching it at the yellow boxes on the platforms before boarding. Otherwise, one is charged a 5 Euro transportation violation fee. Despite the fact that no one volunteered the information that the ticket had to be “validated” after purchase. And despite the fact that paying for the train’s “service” was rather pointless to begin with because the train was one hour leaving to begin with and no information or update was given to explain anything. And also despite there not being any marquee or intercom speaker that tells you at which station the train is stopping.

Cannoli #6: It is impossible to find tourist information in Italy. If one is fortunate enough of find a tourist information booth, the state-employed cranky personnel likely cannot help you.

Cannoli #7: If one is a woman, it is generally a good rule of thumb to seek out information from women personnel. On several occasions, treatment from Italian male workers, especially with enquires regarding train times and ticket purchasing, was so disrespectful and intimidating including, but not limited to: literally yelling at you in anger, throwing a credit card back in your face, or talking to themselves under their breath most likely cursing you in Italian.

Cannoli #8: Despite the above, the male security workers at the Vatican are very helpful, safe, respectful, and absolutely gorgeous.

Cannoli #9: Ironically, a chicken sandwich meal with cannoli at McDonald’s was the most expensive meal we ate in Italy.

Cannoli #10: Pizza and pasta in Italy are not just stereotypes. They are cheap mainstays to hungry college students on a budget. Parmesean cheese and noodles for 4 Euro = at least two nights of dinner for three.

Cannoli #11: When one does not at least try to speak in Italian, the locals tend to be a bit annoyed with the speaker’s American tourist-ness.

Cannoli #12: Bonjourno, Prego, Bene (and maybe moto bene), and Grazie will get you around in Italy even if you don’t know the language. Just walk around saying it with gusto and a hand gesture: Prrrr-ay-goh, prrr-ay-goh!!

Cannoli #13: If one makes a conscious effort to speak Italian when ordering an orange juice or pizza, for example, she gets laughed at.

Cannoli #14: The Leaning Tower of Pisa is actually really hard to photograph. However “leany” it might look in real life, it is so hard to make it look just as “leany” in the photos. The best photo op for ultimate “leany-ness” is from the southeast side.

Cannoli #15: When you realize you just spent 7 Euro to see a bunch of dead bushes and statues…have fun with it and take photos with statues to salvage the morale.

Cannoli #16: The absurdity of Carnival is perhaps best illustrated by San Marcos Square in Venice. Locals dress up in elaborate 1800s dresses with masks and glide through the square with the sole purpose of being seen and photographed. However, nothing beats three huge dinosaurs stalking into the square on stilts towering above the crowd, chasing people, surrounding innocent bystanders, dive-bombing into the crowd, grabbing hats and heads, chasing screaming girls, and making weird squawky dinosaur noises. (If I had been just a few years younger, this would have seriously scarred me for life).

Cannoli #17: The main mode of transport within the island city of Venice is by boat. Therefore, one must rely on the waterbus for getting around. Outside the canals on the open sea skirting around the city is quite dangerous. There are no traffic lights, so near as I can tell it is just a free for all with the right-of-way concept. Some must enjoy the thrill of racing a boat to get the inside lane around the city, splashing through a huge barge’s wake in the process with water drenching the sides of a public transport vehicle. No prego para mi.

Cannoli #18: Everything famous that you see in paintings (“The Creation of Adam” on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, The Pieta, the Romulus and Remus wolf statue—which was nearly blocked by a huge construction wall and tiny—is like ten times smaller than you think it is. That is, with the exception of the David. He is HUGE.

Cannoli #19: Sunglasses are one of the best self-defense mechanisms one can have in Italy. They allow you to sweep your surroundings undercover, no one can tell if you’re looking at them, and they are great on the metros. Yes. Even on the metros.

Cannoli #20: Metros in Rome are not pleasant. Dark, dank, and all around sketchy, one should hope she does not get electrocuted from water dripping down onto the electric rail lines. And then there’s pickpocket dodging.

I realize now that these seem to a bit pessimistic and anti-male, and I apologize for that. Perhaps if I spent more time in Italy with the mindset of knowing I was going to live there for a few months, I would be able to work through and be more critical of my pessimism while there. I just simply have never felt so threatened and disrespected just for being a woman—an American woman. I also am usually not so inclined to violence, but in Rome especially, I found myself constantly having to really restrain from turning around and pummeling multiple guys for their crude comments.

But true to Italy’s romantic descriptions was its scenery. Venice was my favorite part of Italy, and while touristy, it was so laid back and festive. I loved being there for Carnival and being able to finally see a sunset after two months of clouds in England. Despite transportation hassles, I loved riding the trains through the country and seeing the colorful stucco houses and farms. All the piazzas, dry sun, and houses in Italy reminded me so much of all the family in San Diego. So in a weird way, I felt at home there because the landscape could have easily been California!

And I also realize, that while frustrating for me as an American tourist used to having information readily available, the mindset for Italians regarding tourism is simply that all the rich history and access to ancient civilization on their doorstep is just simply there—a part of their everyday culture and way of life. There isn’t really a need to capitalize on it as we would be so quick to do in America.

Sorry this is so long. There is of course way more to tell, but I’ll have to talk in person! Much thanks to all for the emails and skype attentiveness. It’s been much easier to communicate with people back home, than I thought it would. And I owe you all for going out of your way to stay in touch and keep me posted. I really, really do appreciate it!

Missed item this week: Free potable water from the tap.

Peace out Brussels sprouts! yo.